The Buffoon And The Dean Of Admissions

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Adam Sandler
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Текст, перевод и аккорды “The Buffoon And The Dean Of Admissions”
And now a buffoon's meeting with the dean of admissions at a prestigious college. [Dean:] Well Michael, I would like to extend my warmest congradulations on your upcoming graduation and I understand you are interested in matriculating here in the fall. [Buffoon:] I got a snake, man! [Dean:] Yes, pets are welcome here on campus. Be it the traditional dog, or cat, or even the occasional reptile. [Buffoon:] One time I fed it some beer man! It was slithering this way and that! It was all fucked up! [Dean:] I'm sure it was. Well we discourage inappropriate drinking among both students and pets here on campus. [Buffoon:] Fuckin' Shit! [Dean:] Yes, that's a not uncommon reaction to this policy. So tell me a little bit more about your background. [Buffoon:] My father's a fucking asshole, man! [Dean:] Hmm, I see. Your feelings of rebelion are not unusual at your age son. [Buffoon:] My mother's a piece of shit too! [Dean:] Well, I hope you can find an outlet for your hostility over the summer so you can come to school in the fall relaxed and ready to learn. [Buffoon:] My teacher in high school was a stupid bitch, man! She had her head way up her ass! [Dean:] Well the quality of the faculty at a University such as ours far exceeds that of a local public high school. [Buffoon:] Your secretary's a real fat bitch, man! [Dean:] Yes, she's tried many diets over the years with minimal success. [Buffoon:] I had diarhea last month. I had to shit all fucking day! [Dean:] Uh huh, Well we all get the occasional stomach bug, never a pleasurable experience. So have you given any thought to your choice of major? [Buffoon:] I've got a big fucking boner right now. [Dean:] I see. Well sexual arrousal is not uncommon during periods of nervous tension. I do not take offense. [Buffoon:] One time I ate my neighbors shit! [Dean:] That's understandable. Well, I enjoyed meeting you. We'll be sending you our decision by the end of the month. [Buffoon:] I bet you got really hairy balls. [Dean:] Yes, it's a veritable forest down there. Bye bye.

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